Delusion

 

Since when did I start mistaking solitude for loneliness? 

I wondered.

I have been through those dark oceans and made peace with the roaring waves.

Befriended the mermaids, now I know the sea routes by heart.

I found my peace by the lakeside,

where the water remained still but my thoughts started swirling around me.  

I sit there in silence and entangle my own thoughts from emotions, 

and emotions from pain, and pain from people. 

I had been rushing, too. 

The same thing I accused others of, I saw myself leave traces of it. 

And I slowed down, to untangle the mess. 

What’s the rush, why would I fear the end? 

I've seen this world end so many times, it no longer bothers me. 

I can be pretty delusional at times, or maybe all the time.